Sorry it's been so long guys! I just needed some inspiration and I've been busy with family and friends :) I found something to talk about though! It's not related to homosexuality, in fact I feel most of the stuff in this blog has been more relative to just life in general as opposed to homosexuality lol.
I believe I've mentioned this in past posts, the fact that I am very self conscious about my unmasculinity. Recently I have been tweaking out more and more because I can't quit comparing. I watched an ASAP Science video (along with plenty of night of thinking) that explained the body. Now, the reasons I feel unmasculine are mainly physical. I see myself as slim (because people are CONSTANTLY reminding me of how thin I am) short (I'm only 5'8) and as ridiculous as this sounds, hairless. I am under the impression, no thanks to society, that men need to be burly, tall and strong to support a family. Women are naturally drawn to tall muscular men and I am neither of those things. What doesn't help at all is, my best friend is VERY much your generic man. He is 6'1 and 200 lbs with a lot of natural muscle. I complimented him, but in the wrong way. This probably doesn't make a lot of sense right now, I'll explain. I would say something along the lines of "you're lucky you're so tall and naturally huge". This type of compliment was obviously directed towards him but also it was directed at myself. I would verbally put down myself by emphasizing the physical qualities I wish I had the he did. That is envy my friends.
Envy is just as any other sin, addicting and self destructive. I felt unfit for a family, a son, a brother, a friend and a man because of this. Just recently though, I found some quotes and videos, as I mentioned above, that have helped me change my mind. I convinced myself that I am not destined to be gay. I felt condemned to homosexuality because I wasn't masculine enough to take care of a woman or hold her. My son wouldn't have the big strong father he should have, not like the one my 6'1 beast of a man friend would be. Why would she choose me over him or another man just as big, if not bigger than him?
After thinking and reading multiple things, I came to realize that
1. people love people, not genders. I am not going to allow myself to be with a man only because I am unconfident in my own masculinity.
2. What happens, happens. If I meet a woman who I find intriguing then so be it! I will act on how I feel regardless of sex. I don't want to say I am Bisexual, because that is a title and I am not willing to accept titles. Titles are exactly what lead me to believe I am unfit for a man. I am just me, and that's that.
3. I am built to operate at my best. My body may not be huge and muscular, but the amount of muscle I do have is optimal for my bodies build to operate in the most healthy way possible. The best I can do is reach my individual peak of muscularity if I so please and take pride in the work I have done to get there. Being short and slim, with large ribs has a huge advantage. My friend I mentioned earlier in this blog may be able to lift more but I ran 30 minutes without exercising for a year, if not more. I'm built for endurance and that is just as good a quality as being big and strong. I don't mean to compare but for this particular reason, it will provide a good example. He lifts more than me, I can out run him. We're both built differently and there are a TON of people on this planet. There is no way that there is not one woman who wouldn't want to be with me. I say woman because at this point in time, I want a family of my own to take care of. When the time comes, however, I know I will be happy regardless of what sex I am with.
4.Being the best is impossible. There is only one person who can be number one. Everyone else is set on a level. Don't feel inferior to people on a higher level though because it's not like you're stuck on one level of whatever it is you decide to compare. Everything can be worked on. Not only that but there are other people on the same exact level as you. I don't know if this helps you as much as it helps me, I just like to feel that I'm not alone and that progress is a possibility. Also keep in mind that what that one person is good at that you feel you are not good at, is not as good as you at something you can do.
I am a little bit strange and I may be small, but I can run like Sonic and have faith that there is someone out there who will love me for who I am, other than my family and friends :) Everyone has a physical and personality preference for their ideal individual, that being said, that is A LOT of different variations of preferences. It doesn't matter if I am not the most attractive man, or even if I'm not as attractive as my friends. It's the fact that they are not who I am. They don't, nor can they, think like me, act like, or even be like me. Same goes for everyone else who is reading this. You are extremely unique in the best way possible. Embrace your personal skills and refrain from comparison to others. It will lead you deeper in to envious thoughts and end up destroying your mental health.
Saturday, July 27, 2013
Tuesday, June 11, 2013
The worst kind of hope...
Is the hope that becomes a growth. It's a cancer building upon itself until we can't see anything else happening, we don't want to see anything else happen, other than seeing this hope become our reality.
I bring this up because it's something I often easily find myself fighting. Hope that maybe I'll be straight, hope that maybe being a musician isn't as unstable as people say, hope that people will be accepting. For those of us who enjoy feeling and allow ourselves to embrace our emotions, we deal with this a lot. It is and is not our fault.
The more we think about it (the more we want it), the more we can see it become our future. Worse part is, there is still that little voice telling us "This isn't right". I will never say all hope is vein but it's all in moderation. We control our thoughts and in this sense it is our fault. It is not our fault completely though because we can't control what we want and what we don't, we can only control to what degree we want it.
Now, this is the hardest part, ignore it. I hate to say it, but when hope is eating you alive because you know that this is just not possible, yet you continue to fantasize because it's something you've always wanted, something so divine that it will affect you in the best way possible, it's time to stop. What is in our future will be there, it's waiting and what happens happens. It's not going to change when the moment passes. It will happen just as it should and if what does happen doesn't match up to what you think should happen, you will be distraught after allowing those fantasies to consume your thoughts.
It's best to realize the unhealthy addictions before it has a chance to damage you. Hope is a grand aspect of life, it aids us in our pursuit of our goals. Without it, ambition wouldn't exist, we need that want, that hope that something will happen and grant us this gift.When it so obviously is too farfetched, it's destructive. So don't ever give up on dreams, don't lose your hope, just don't expect it to happen. Expect everything and be satisfied with nothing, or expect nothing and be satisfied with everything.
I apologize if my blogs have become increasingly depressing lately, but these have been things I have dealt with. Everything on this blog will be something I have personally dealt with. Some of them will be light hearted others may not, but I just wanted to get this warning out there.
Basically put, keep yourself in check. Don't expect anything to happen or you will find yourself disappointed too often. Hope this helps open some eyes :) hope you guys have all experienced something fantastic lately! Love you all :)
I bring this up because it's something I often easily find myself fighting. Hope that maybe I'll be straight, hope that maybe being a musician isn't as unstable as people say, hope that people will be accepting. For those of us who enjoy feeling and allow ourselves to embrace our emotions, we deal with this a lot. It is and is not our fault.
The more we think about it (the more we want it), the more we can see it become our future. Worse part is, there is still that little voice telling us "This isn't right". I will never say all hope is vein but it's all in moderation. We control our thoughts and in this sense it is our fault. It is not our fault completely though because we can't control what we want and what we don't, we can only control to what degree we want it.
Now, this is the hardest part, ignore it. I hate to say it, but when hope is eating you alive because you know that this is just not possible, yet you continue to fantasize because it's something you've always wanted, something so divine that it will affect you in the best way possible, it's time to stop. What is in our future will be there, it's waiting and what happens happens. It's not going to change when the moment passes. It will happen just as it should and if what does happen doesn't match up to what you think should happen, you will be distraught after allowing those fantasies to consume your thoughts.
It's best to realize the unhealthy addictions before it has a chance to damage you. Hope is a grand aspect of life, it aids us in our pursuit of our goals. Without it, ambition wouldn't exist, we need that want, that hope that something will happen and grant us this gift.When it so obviously is too farfetched, it's destructive. So don't ever give up on dreams, don't lose your hope, just don't expect it to happen. Expect everything and be satisfied with nothing, or expect nothing and be satisfied with everything.
I apologize if my blogs have become increasingly depressing lately, but these have been things I have dealt with. Everything on this blog will be something I have personally dealt with. Some of them will be light hearted others may not, but I just wanted to get this warning out there.
Basically put, keep yourself in check. Don't expect anything to happen or you will find yourself disappointed too often. Hope this helps open some eyes :) hope you guys have all experienced something fantastic lately! Love you all :)
Saturday, June 1, 2013
Your mind is your worst enemy
Hey friends :) Today I was thinking about why homosexuality is not a terrible thing. It's kind of funny I made this blog to directly assess the topic of homosexuality and I've been discussing the byproducts such as depression, self rejection, and suicide more so than I have the topic of being gay.
I figured tonight I would post my thoughts on homosexuality. More on a social level as opposed to religious though because I don't know how many people are religious and whether we deal with the religious side or not, we will all face the social rejection.
Let's think about society for a second. Now, I don't want to be some sort of hippy who says society is corrupt and blah blah blah, but they create ideas in our minds of right and wrong that aren't necessarily right or wrong. Example, I have faced difficulties finding myself attractive because I am very short, thin, and just feel unmasculine. Why do I feel this way though? It's because society has created this image that men should be tall, muscular, eat beef jerky, and drink beer. A man is a man. Simple as that, if you have your man hood, you're a man. Sorry if that's weird but I mean....there's no sense in complicating it. Society freaks out about everything. They believe sugar, along with a million other foods, when mass consumed, causes cancer with no back up research. Anything in excess can have a terrible outcome, but they are just constantly searching for answers and homosexuality is one thing that is unanswered.
Personally, I can understand the fear of the unknown to an extent. Space scares me because we haven't explored it yet, it's huge, it's deadly and dark. I even feel uneasy in pitch black because I don't know what's there, but when it comes to personality, the unknown does not affect me. So, I guess I can't comprehend why people are afraid of homosexuality just because it's unexplained. Since homosexuality is such an unknown topic though, people are immediately detesting it because it doesn't make sense, it's strange. Now what the heck is wrong with abnormality? There is not one single human on this planet that is not considered strange by someone else.
The issue is perspective. I just think that when one perspective has been expressed, especially by a community, it becomes a mindset. The mindset grows on people and becomes apart of their own beliefs, homosexuality is victim of this permeating perspective. People express dislike towards homosexuals, and yet they have problems of their own. The pot calling the kettle black. Don't you dare tell me I am abnormal just because I express my differences. If I looked down deep enough to find something I found odd about you, I could easily point it out and ridicule that same someone who ridicules me. At least I am comfortable enough to be me, to allow myself my happiness in my so called "mistake".
The worst part is we can't change this. What others feel or think is not in our control, but that doesn't mean we should be taken down because of them. Your mind is your own worst enemy. No one can put you down without your consent. Filter your thoughts, filter the outside influences and rid yourself of them. If someone keeps putting you down and makes you feel uncomfortable with yourself, tell them either they need to keep their mouth shut or you need to stop talking because it's not fair. You could just as easily express disappointment in them against something you don't agree with that they do. Learn to ignore the comments, it's not easy at all. Feeling isolated like that is hurtful. When you know people are against you, especially a whole community is against you, it's tough but you know there is also a lot of people who aren't. There are a million people who would love to help or to accept others. The thing is, the people who dislike homosexuality are just very outspoken about it, the people who don't mind don't feel the need to say anything because it doesn't bother them, if that makes sense. People seem to just love to complain I guess is what it is. Just know, that they have as many faults as you do. I don't care how perfect they seem, they have something about them that another person would consider either strange or wrong.
Basically, just ignore rude comments. What is life anyways? Are we not here to spend time? Shouldn't that time be worth spending? Then love yourself and other, because being hateful, even if the hate seems justified, is not good. Two wrongs don't make a right. Don't get caught up in those things and just brush off the negatives :) Remember, you aren't weird or abnormal, it's all perspective. Hope this makes sense to you guys and you act on it :)
I figured tonight I would post my thoughts on homosexuality. More on a social level as opposed to religious though because I don't know how many people are religious and whether we deal with the religious side or not, we will all face the social rejection.
Let's think about society for a second. Now, I don't want to be some sort of hippy who says society is corrupt and blah blah blah, but they create ideas in our minds of right and wrong that aren't necessarily right or wrong. Example, I have faced difficulties finding myself attractive because I am very short, thin, and just feel unmasculine. Why do I feel this way though? It's because society has created this image that men should be tall, muscular, eat beef jerky, and drink beer. A man is a man. Simple as that, if you have your man hood, you're a man. Sorry if that's weird but I mean....there's no sense in complicating it. Society freaks out about everything. They believe sugar, along with a million other foods, when mass consumed, causes cancer with no back up research. Anything in excess can have a terrible outcome, but they are just constantly searching for answers and homosexuality is one thing that is unanswered.
Personally, I can understand the fear of the unknown to an extent. Space scares me because we haven't explored it yet, it's huge, it's deadly and dark. I even feel uneasy in pitch black because I don't know what's there, but when it comes to personality, the unknown does not affect me. So, I guess I can't comprehend why people are afraid of homosexuality just because it's unexplained. Since homosexuality is such an unknown topic though, people are immediately detesting it because it doesn't make sense, it's strange. Now what the heck is wrong with abnormality? There is not one single human on this planet that is not considered strange by someone else.
The issue is perspective. I just think that when one perspective has been expressed, especially by a community, it becomes a mindset. The mindset grows on people and becomes apart of their own beliefs, homosexuality is victim of this permeating perspective. People express dislike towards homosexuals, and yet they have problems of their own. The pot calling the kettle black. Don't you dare tell me I am abnormal just because I express my differences. If I looked down deep enough to find something I found odd about you, I could easily point it out and ridicule that same someone who ridicules me. At least I am comfortable enough to be me, to allow myself my happiness in my so called "mistake".
The worst part is we can't change this. What others feel or think is not in our control, but that doesn't mean we should be taken down because of them. Your mind is your own worst enemy. No one can put you down without your consent. Filter your thoughts, filter the outside influences and rid yourself of them. If someone keeps putting you down and makes you feel uncomfortable with yourself, tell them either they need to keep their mouth shut or you need to stop talking because it's not fair. You could just as easily express disappointment in them against something you don't agree with that they do. Learn to ignore the comments, it's not easy at all. Feeling isolated like that is hurtful. When you know people are against you, especially a whole community is against you, it's tough but you know there is also a lot of people who aren't. There are a million people who would love to help or to accept others. The thing is, the people who dislike homosexuality are just very outspoken about it, the people who don't mind don't feel the need to say anything because it doesn't bother them, if that makes sense. People seem to just love to complain I guess is what it is. Just know, that they have as many faults as you do. I don't care how perfect they seem, they have something about them that another person would consider either strange or wrong.
Basically, just ignore rude comments. What is life anyways? Are we not here to spend time? Shouldn't that time be worth spending? Then love yourself and other, because being hateful, even if the hate seems justified, is not good. Two wrongs don't make a right. Don't get caught up in those things and just brush off the negatives :) Remember, you aren't weird or abnormal, it's all perspective. Hope this makes sense to you guys and you act on it :)
Sunday, May 26, 2013
After 6 years..
So I feel like I haven't posted anything for 6 years lol. It's probably been only 5 days? I can't remember and I'm too lazy to check at this very moment, but good news! I got some people to share my blog and got some professional recommendations to share it as well. I am starting a meet up on Meetup.com, so excited :D I have still had a very difficult time thinking of things to talk about but, one thing that can get to me quite often is, why am I who I am? I don't mean the way I was raised but more so, why did I have to turn out gay?
I have friends who don't disown me because I'm gay but don't necessarily like that I'm gay. They encourage I fight it, yet say they accept it. I love that they are okay with it, and they feel they can express themselves around me, but what never feels okay is that I know it's something they want me to deny. Do they accept me? I always think to myself, if they did then why would they feel this way? I guess they don't necessarily dislike me, it's something I am they dislike, but to me...what I am is who I am.
This leads me to ask, why couldn't I just be straight? Life would be so much easier. I would love to have children of my own flesh and blood, a product of love, something very precious between me and my spouse. Religiously it would save me troubled thoughts of potentially going to hell. I know having children (naturally) is not possible though with who I am. I always want to say "who I've chosen to be", but I never chose this. Honestly, if I could still be me without being gay then I would! In a heart beat. Here's the thing though, is it possible to be me if I had never been trialed?
If I was never gay, or even had the thoughts at all, I would have never felt the rejection of myself or from others that rejected me back in 8th grade. Those were terrible times, I won't lie, but they are key to who I am today. I hated myself, I felt hate from others, and in this I was able to learn to care more than ever. Feeling so low and down allowed me the capability to empathize for others who feel low as well. Not only this but I've learned it's important to put myself in the shoes of others.
The reason I started this blog is because of the stuff I faced, the reason I want to make a community support group is to help people who are fighting what I have fought. I hope this is all coming clear, I'm okay with being gay, even if I face some sort of passive/aggressive rejection because it's helped me help others. Putting myself into the shoes of others has taught me to give the benefit of the doubt to others. Horrible things happen to good people, people are bullies as a result of this, people judge as a result of this, and I don't want to say I'm okay with such behaviors but I can't blame them.
Basically, I am a strong believer in that we are all meant for something. No one life is meaningless and what happens to us happens for a reason. Life is an experience and just like a video game, we get stronger as we go :D (love the nerd references eh?). I may be a broken record at times, saying these things over and over but a lot of events have revealed this to me. I am gay to help other people who may need it. Maybe you're gay, maybe you were an addict of some sort, maybe you were traumatized as a child by something, or maybe even traumatized recently. There is a reason it happened, think of what you can teach with that pain! I may sound a tad masochistic right now, but it's healthy pain. Teach your lessons and let people use you as a guide! It's a fantastic moment in life when you are capable of giving an opinion that you know will make a person think. Advice is priceless and a mind that contains this treasure is worth even more.
Be aware of who you are, and why you dealt with life so far! You're potential is far beyond what you believe, show yourself it's more than you think it is :)
I have friends who don't disown me because I'm gay but don't necessarily like that I'm gay. They encourage I fight it, yet say they accept it. I love that they are okay with it, and they feel they can express themselves around me, but what never feels okay is that I know it's something they want me to deny. Do they accept me? I always think to myself, if they did then why would they feel this way? I guess they don't necessarily dislike me, it's something I am they dislike, but to me...what I am is who I am.
This leads me to ask, why couldn't I just be straight? Life would be so much easier. I would love to have children of my own flesh and blood, a product of love, something very precious between me and my spouse. Religiously it would save me troubled thoughts of potentially going to hell. I know having children (naturally) is not possible though with who I am. I always want to say "who I've chosen to be", but I never chose this. Honestly, if I could still be me without being gay then I would! In a heart beat. Here's the thing though, is it possible to be me if I had never been trialed?
If I was never gay, or even had the thoughts at all, I would have never felt the rejection of myself or from others that rejected me back in 8th grade. Those were terrible times, I won't lie, but they are key to who I am today. I hated myself, I felt hate from others, and in this I was able to learn to care more than ever. Feeling so low and down allowed me the capability to empathize for others who feel low as well. Not only this but I've learned it's important to put myself in the shoes of others.
The reason I started this blog is because of the stuff I faced, the reason I want to make a community support group is to help people who are fighting what I have fought. I hope this is all coming clear, I'm okay with being gay, even if I face some sort of passive/aggressive rejection because it's helped me help others. Putting myself into the shoes of others has taught me to give the benefit of the doubt to others. Horrible things happen to good people, people are bullies as a result of this, people judge as a result of this, and I don't want to say I'm okay with such behaviors but I can't blame them.
Basically, I am a strong believer in that we are all meant for something. No one life is meaningless and what happens to us happens for a reason. Life is an experience and just like a video game, we get stronger as we go :D (love the nerd references eh?). I may be a broken record at times, saying these things over and over but a lot of events have revealed this to me. I am gay to help other people who may need it. Maybe you're gay, maybe you were an addict of some sort, maybe you were traumatized as a child by something, or maybe even traumatized recently. There is a reason it happened, think of what you can teach with that pain! I may sound a tad masochistic right now, but it's healthy pain. Teach your lessons and let people use you as a guide! It's a fantastic moment in life when you are capable of giving an opinion that you know will make a person think. Advice is priceless and a mind that contains this treasure is worth even more.
Be aware of who you are, and why you dealt with life so far! You're potential is far beyond what you believe, show yourself it's more than you think it is :)
Sunday, May 19, 2013
Everyday...
As you all know, I have been trying to post one thing a day. This is getting increasingly difficult lol. So my incredibly brilliant friend of mine recommended I gather ideas throughout the week and set up one day to blog about my encounters/ideas. I am going to begin to do this so I am not scrounging for ideas and hopefully I will keep this blog going! I enjoy it a lot, it's fun to know that people have seen it and for anyone who has kept up with reading it thank you! :) it means the world to me!
Saturday, May 18, 2013
Realizing our existence
I once had a conversation with my sister that, after we came to this realization together, enlightened me on humanity. I've never had a doubt about the fact that we need each other because we are social creatures and that is proven with psychological tests and what not. I, however, never personally saw and example of this behavior, simply just had heard of it.
Here's how it goes. I was in the car with my sister as she started her job at 9-1-1. She mentioned people talked to her like she was a machine, they become impatient and rude. Now I understand they are probably freaked out because of an emergency, so that completely makes sense but it's still something you recognize, that when you are behind a machine answering questions, you are a machine answering questions to those people. I already figured as much because it's the same psychology behind road rage, they feel it's ok to freak out because it's just a machine, they are not cognizant of the fact that that IS a person behind the wheel. I said "Well then why don't they just have machines do all the work?". My sister replied with "The callers wouldn't be satisfied. They don't realize it, but they rely on us to comfort them". Immediately I was enlightened. Humans aren't just a necessity in a social aspect but we are the only ones capable of expressing emotion, or empathizing.I told her that it's interesting to think that a machine could get the information in faster than we could, more proficient. If that were to happen though, the stress of the situation could get out of hand and your imagination can take it from there.
We need each other. It's just like she said, they rely on the recipient to give them comfort. In multiple calls people ask for the person to stay on the line. Why do you think that is? In case something bad happens? No, because this is AFTER the fact that help has been sent. They want emotional support as well, nothing man made could ever provide us with that. It's incredible to think of us to that extent and almost kind of beautiful.
I STRONGLY believe every person on this planet has a reason. We all need each other, even if you don't do something as intense as 9-1-1 calls. One of my good friends was working and was having troubles with his sexuality at the time. A woman walked up to him and said "You know....I like the term it is what it is" and he ALWAYS said that to comfort himself. It reminded him that, what is happening is for a reason, there's nothing to change, there's no wrong, it is what it is. He was so blown away. Simply talking to someone with the most genuine expression can save their life :) Ralph Waldo Emerson said "To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived - that is to have succeeded". To make someone's day even just a little better is something to be proud of!
Go prove people aren't as terrible as they seem to be. Go prove to people that we aren't just a bunch of machines operating as society intended. Show that we are so much more beyond that! We have these emotions for a reason and even more so, these connections to others. We need each other, unlike the machines we make and I think that is something amazing to realize :)
P.S. Sorry for my late blog entry! I've been with my friend all day and didn't really have the time.
Here's how it goes. I was in the car with my sister as she started her job at 9-1-1. She mentioned people talked to her like she was a machine, they become impatient and rude. Now I understand they are probably freaked out because of an emergency, so that completely makes sense but it's still something you recognize, that when you are behind a machine answering questions, you are a machine answering questions to those people. I already figured as much because it's the same psychology behind road rage, they feel it's ok to freak out because it's just a machine, they are not cognizant of the fact that that IS a person behind the wheel. I said "Well then why don't they just have machines do all the work?". My sister replied with "The callers wouldn't be satisfied. They don't realize it, but they rely on us to comfort them". Immediately I was enlightened. Humans aren't just a necessity in a social aspect but we are the only ones capable of expressing emotion, or empathizing.I told her that it's interesting to think that a machine could get the information in faster than we could, more proficient. If that were to happen though, the stress of the situation could get out of hand and your imagination can take it from there.
We need each other. It's just like she said, they rely on the recipient to give them comfort. In multiple calls people ask for the person to stay on the line. Why do you think that is? In case something bad happens? No, because this is AFTER the fact that help has been sent. They want emotional support as well, nothing man made could ever provide us with that. It's incredible to think of us to that extent and almost kind of beautiful.
I STRONGLY believe every person on this planet has a reason. We all need each other, even if you don't do something as intense as 9-1-1 calls. One of my good friends was working and was having troubles with his sexuality at the time. A woman walked up to him and said "You know....I like the term it is what it is" and he ALWAYS said that to comfort himself. It reminded him that, what is happening is for a reason, there's nothing to change, there's no wrong, it is what it is. He was so blown away. Simply talking to someone with the most genuine expression can save their life :) Ralph Waldo Emerson said "To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived - that is to have succeeded". To make someone's day even just a little better is something to be proud of!
Go prove people aren't as terrible as they seem to be. Go prove to people that we aren't just a bunch of machines operating as society intended. Show that we are so much more beyond that! We have these emotions for a reason and even more so, these connections to others. We need each other, unlike the machines we make and I think that is something amazing to realize :)
P.S. Sorry for my late blog entry! I've been with my friend all day and didn't really have the time.
Friday, May 17, 2013
Yesterday carries on
It was recommended that I share the art that has helped me throughout my time dealing with things so this post is going to be full of mainly quotes and songs. A blog on food for thought I guess.
Before I continue, I just wanted to share some of my music I've written. All of it is on YouTube (http://www.youtube.com/user/forsakable123) feel free to check it out!
Before I continue, I just wanted to share some of my music I've written. All of it is on YouTube (http://www.youtube.com/user/forsakable123) feel free to check it out!
Of course I know we don't all share the same taste in art but in case anyone is interested :)
Canvas by Imogen heap
This song is PURE art. Put some headphones in and listen. Do not just hear it, don't make it background noise, listen. It's gorgeous.
The Moment I Said It by Imogen Heap
This song was something I listened to every time I had a panic attack. It made me see myself from an outside perspective, how my friends felt when they saw me dealing with stuff and made me want to deal with what I had. It's normal to experience discomfort in your own mind and have doubts about yourself but when it becomes heavy on those people who care, it's time to do what you have to to fix the problem. It just gets worse and worse on the both of you.
Speeding Cars by Imogen Heap
A song that really helped me keep my head on straight. Lots of Imogen haha, she's a good person.
Quotes
All of these quotes were very inspirational. Many of them by transcendentalists, I am not on myself but I love the way they think about certain aspects of life.
“Is it so bad, then, to be misunderstood? Pythagoras was misunderstood, and Socrates, and Jesus, and Luther, and Copernicus, and Galileo, and Newton, and every pure and wise spirit that ever took flesh. To be great is to be misunderstood.”
"Envy is ignorance; That imitation is suicide" - This one was big for me. I remember thinking I would try and satisfy the majority by being straight and living with it. I envied those who were straight because I wish I was, however this combination of envy and imitation was a horrible mistake on my part and ultimately lead to self destructive behavior.
"Courage does not always roar, sometimes Courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying 'I'll try again tomorrow."
"When you take a flower in your hand and really look at it, it's your world for the moment" - Live in the moment :)
"A fool flatters himself, a wise man flatters the fool."
Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton - Be wise and learn form the mistake we make. Learn from the mistake of others, we don't have enough time to make them all ourselves (this is a quote too but it fits with this one lol so they go together)
Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton - Be wise and learn form the mistake we make. Learn from the mistake of others, we don't have enough time to make them all ourselves (this is a quote too but it fits with this one lol so they go together)
""By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest.
Confucius "
"I'd rather regret the things I've done than regret the things I haven't done.
Lucille Ball "
Lucille Ball "
"1 Corinthians 13:4-8
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away."
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away."
Try applying these to your own life style. Quotes are just bits of wisdom, things to learn from other people. Take them into consideration, don't just read them. They hold moral value, which is what a majority of us lack. I'm not trying to sound self righteous, because I know I have a lot to learn. The difference is, I try to learn, and those who don't pay attention, never try. Don't try and you won't get very far. Wisdom is a grand quality in a person. I've never met a person who has expressed dislike towards a wise man/woman. Like I said, learn from the quotes, from the mistakes of others and apply them to yourself :) I can honestly say it helped a lot. I spent most of my time on the internet looking up quotes when I first came out and was dealing with other kids who enjoyed making fun of me. Quotes and Music are 2 fantastic pieces of wisdom to pass on :) Hopefully this helps or sparks some interest in you all who are searching for an outlet, or an answer of some sort.
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